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Francis' One Little Secret to Successful Dieting

Russ Jones

Francis’ blog.  Stardate 12666.3.  Life is so strange.  Destination unknown.

Hello, boys and girls, humans and subhumans.  Francis here with another installment of blogs by Francis.  Today I want to blog a little bit about blogging. Apparently, we’ve been doing it wrong.  So we’re going to flog ourselves on our blogging blog. You see, the way successful blogging is supposed to work is through hard work and research.  Content is King, they say. But the rest of the story, Paul Harvey aside, is that evidently you need to do massive research to find out what people are searching for on the internet, then tell them what they want to hear.  You must make sure you’re using the key words they are using to search with and then give them the same content they can get anywhere else, in a format they’re used to. Maybe a listicle or a howto. In fact, if you have a specific interest as a blogger and intend to share your knowledge, don’t expect it to sell well.  Nosireebob, nope. Lifestyle trends, celebrity gossip, product reviews, money and how to get it, love and lust. These things sell. So, I, Francis, a being who is now just the internal crunchies of what used to be, should be blogging about the latest diet trend and how effective it was for me. News flash, if you’ve seen a picture of me lately, you know it wasn’t effective.  

So, as the Ohana mascot, I’m here to set the record straight.  We’re going to continue to do our blog wrong. What can you expect as we move forward?  Interesting anecdotes. Stories from me. Reports on our adventures. Talk about our areas of expertise.  Reviews of tools and things we use. How to articles on making and repairing jewelry equipment. Articles on our methods and processes.  In other words, things that interest the Ohana and its members.

An example might be Emperor’s use of the five different torches he uses and why.  Or maybe why Domestic Goddess dilutes some oils and not others. Or perhaps Wren on hand-stitching leather vs machine stitching.  Perhaps Myk will chime in with a bit about his process of upcycling glass into his signature line (coming soon to our webpage). All this coming to a blog near you soon!

I’ll close with a non-sequitur, interesting anecdote titled “Grandchildren are magical.”  As Emperor was going to bed last night, he noticed a raisin stuck to his leg. Now, he wore long pants all day and had made his bed early in the morning.  Somehow, one of his grandchildren got the raisin in his bed. An area that’s off limits for them and was covered the entire day. As he drifted off to sleep, he kept wondering how they did it.  And after he went to sleep, when it was safe to do so, I quietly laughed at him. Very, very quietly. I wouldn’t want him to think I did it.

Until next week...unless Emperor orders a stand-down for his birthday, then it will be the next week...so long my faithful followers.

Love Francis!  (Grammarians beware, the lack of comma is intentional...that statement is an imperative).


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